Number of dating partners before marriage
You see, I've always had this two year rule in my mind for how long I want to date someone before we get married. After twenty-four months together, you usually know whether your partner is someone you could really commit to—forever.But a lot of my friends have been getting married with fewer than this magical two years under their belts, and it's making me second-guess my rule. Does it really matter at all how long you date before you get married?For some reason, the modern sitcom seems to be the only venue that openly addresses the dark awkwardness of a dating partner’s sexual past.Television can make such a history into a lot of things — meaningless, devastating, even humorous.But it cannot redeem it, at least not in any truly deep and lasting way.But the gospel offers real grace for the heart reeling that can happen from finding out about a boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s sexual past.The purpose of dating is to get to know someone as fully as possible before tying the knot—ultimately with the goal of having a successful marriage that lasts.But what exactly is transpiring in this time that either confirms or disproves compatibility? Especially as our notions of dating practices change (thanks, Tinder), and we consistently hear about the supposed 50 percent divorce rate, I think we all wonder if there's some definitive rule book we be following.
This makes permanently partnering up with the first person you date a bit of a gamble: You should date a few people to get the lay of the land.
I did some digging and reached out to relationship therapists and psychologists to get their thoughts.